Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Tricks and Tips "They" Don't Want You to Know About

Unless you're allergic (in that case disregard, unless you're freaking, psychotically masochistic and like the thought of anaphylaxis) or under that age of one then honey is a wonderful cure-most, not just a tasty treat in teas, on pancakes or on your lover's naughty bits.
Honey has antimicrobial enzymes that work wonders on wounds as a poultice. It cleans out nasty infections pretty damn quick. There is a sterilized, expensive form of honey used in the treatment of diabetic wounds.
But wait. There's more. Honey also works on coughs just as well and in some cases better than major labeled cough syrup.
Got an infected wound and are too cheap to see a doctor or have a nasty, dry cough and don't like the taste of cough syrup? Honey is your answer. So slather it on and bandage it up or chug it down.

I loves me some pickles but vinegar isn't just for pickling, German food, marinades or vinaigrette. Mixed with water and a tiny amount of dish soap it makes some of the best glass/general purpose cleaner on the planet.
Have heartburn? Chronically? Are we talking in the acid reflux category?
Mix about a shot's worth of apple cider vinegar in with a tall glass of your favoritus juice and slam it down. You could get all crazy like me and take white vinegar straight up but I don't recommend it.
And that's all for... wait? What? Oh yeah. Heartburn isn't caused by too much acid in your digestive system. It's caused by a lack of acid. If your diet consists of a heavy amount of wonderfully, greasy fried or processed foods then chances are your stomach isn't going to be able to produce enough acid to cover the job. It needs support. It's kinda like calling in a strafing when your ground troops are getting riddled with bullets and shrapnel.

I may have more next time kiddies...

Tuesday, December 27, 2011


It started late last week.... It was my turn on the winter cold bracket. I got the stuffy nose, turning me into a mouth breather while I sleep and waking with cotton mouth so bad it makes me wish I had the munchies and squinty eyes. Next on the list is a sciatic nerve gone wonky. Which means I could find a comfy spot for all of an instant before the right side of my lower back decided it wanted to cause me more of that indescribable annoyance of pain. Nope... not the good old fashioned, endorphin secreting pain. It's that dull, achy pain I cannot really describe (okay, let me try.... like a toothache in the lower back).
Now that the cold is half way done and the lower back is feeling a little better lets go ahead and pop a rib out of place....
So um... how was your Christmas?

Saturday, December 24, 2011

'Twas the Night Before Christmas...

... and I'll be at work
Making some money
As an overtimed clerk
While you are nestled
And drunk in your bed
I'll have those dollar signs
Dance through my head...

Merry Christmas and stuff...

Monday, December 19, 2011

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Repurposing the Blog

This past year has been a boring one with the last few months or so being so unsavagely boring I decided to lay low, step away from blogging and try the really real world for once. Let me say that the really real world kind sucks balls and not in the fun foreplay kinda way either.

During my hiatus I tried writing my novel only to have ADD kick in and never getting beyond the first 1800 words or so of chapter one. I did a bunch of garden prep for the spring and decided that I should write a "green" blog because I'm a cheap bastard. I never really go around to it.
Recently (being bored at work) I started thinking about surviving a zombie apocalypse. There are several books and manuals on the subject and there are several sites you can go to to find out the things you'd need. So I figured that most of it is impractical bullshit and I'd write about what you'd really need to survive. I'm adding that to the blog too. May even write a book about it.

Of course I'll be blogging about my life (or lack there of) as I go.